Roger and I reopened for placements on July 2nd. When Junior left we took a break before opening for placements on April 1st (not a fool's day joke). We got one SUUUUUPER rough placement that only lasted one night (which really did feel like a fool's day joke). It was rather nightmarish and not something I'd care to repeat. Somewhere in the chaos my heart ached for the boys that needed some special care that we were clearly not able to give..but it was hard to keep track of that empathy while a 4 year was thrashing and screaming on our couch until 3:30am. Suffice it to say that didn't go super well and it made us really wary of taking another placement. I generally float somewhere in between fear of the unknown and a burning desire to reach these kids and love them. We ended up closing again and only being open for respite (which no one apparently needed) through June because June was a crazy-hectic month for us. Pretty much every weekend we had commitments for the duration of the weekend or were out of town.
Finally July has arrived and our commitments are pretty much non-existent. No time like the present to take another placement, right? So we decided on an age range. We've learned about ourselves and our situation over the last almost-2-years and realized that we need to figure out what works for us or at least try to figure it out. As best as we can figure it with our available space and available finances, kids ages 3-7 would be the best fit for us. In an effort to not limit what God has for us I let them know that we would take any phone calls on kids they thought would be a good fit..3-7 is just our best guess. It was a bit nerve-wracking opening back up again. We're not going into this with the same so-excited-we-can't-see-straight mentality anymore. We know things now. Not all of them pleasant...
The encouraging news is that we said yes to a placement this past week. We didn't end up needing to take him because they found a family member but we said yes and that's what counts. =) I'll be honest..I'm practically begging God to go easy on us with the next placement we get. I'm making an effort to pray for His will and pray less out of fear, but it's not particularly easy.
Update on Junior
:
We get to see him! We've seen him multiple times since he went home and it has been great. His dad has told us that anytime we want to see him we can just give him a call and we'll work out the timing. The first time we saw him he was incredibly shy and it took him awhile to warm up. The last time we saw him it was just me and him and we had loads of fun. It's fun to get to treat him like a nephew instead of like a son. More spoiling, less worry about rules and such. =) He's doing really well at home with his dad. Hmm...did I just say home? Uh, yup! As I had hoped my heart and head have reconciled and I am thrilled that he is doing so well. The case is actually closed on him and David so DHS isn't involved anymore. WTG bio-dad! Junior is thriving and we still get to see him and he's an adorable little cutie pie with as much sass as I remember (just look at that picture! No chance can you argue it!). I feel so blessed to be able to look back on the experience with the boys and see the growth in them and us and the hope that comes along with such drastically awesome changes. Spending time with this awesome little guy gives me courage to do it again.
